Realisation Hurts..

i admit. i finally realised i am nothing but an immature guy. i am a cold person. and that means i am not the friendly kind of guy. i've been trying to melt myself into someone who's comfortable with people around me. and the effort still goes on till this very day after 19 yrs of life..(going on 20) *shakes head*

i admit. i used to think i was knowledgeable. boy, was i wrong. friends of mine made my seemingly-vast brain look so timid. just like kacang putih. i never wanted to acknowledge it although i KNEW it before. but it struck me on saturday, after a gathering with old buddies.

i admit. they overtook me without me realising it. while everyone was living the life ahead, i was going backwards. i made a fool of myself. who was i bluffing to? i was and i am living the life half of my age. that is where it hurts. wasted moments. wasted life. the immaturity of my thoughts, character and personality. so many to catch up on. but lets put it this way then. I FEEL YOUNG!!

i admit. nah,that was silly. how will i fare in the days ahead??